Testing Fanatic Gifts

Shopping trolley testing department: 'That one went exactly where you wanted it to go, I'm going to have to fail it.'

"Waiting for the vaccine launch."

"And you're certain these are accidents?"

'I really crammed last night.'

"I, TikTok."

"You're kidding! You count S.A.T.s?"

"I'm being punished. I have to stay out of Wi-Fi range for an hour."

"We're going to run some tests: bloodwork, a cat-scan and the S.A.T.'s."

Silicon Vale

When you said you were going to find your ancestors I thought you meant on the INTERNET!

"Someone just pinched my mobile phone"

'They want to close our lab. What's that all about?'

"I looks like a Martian dropped their phone. And by the size of it, I hope they're friendly."

Zoology. Cheetahs can reach speeds up to sixty miles an hour! Amazing, and yet they never win!

'It's so cool we have another test today.'

"How'd you know I was in for cyber crime?"

'Hmm... He is remarkably dumb! He would be perfect for our new test-marketing position!'

"Angry or Hangry?

Name stickers on car windscreen.

"See - it works in my fantasy research league."

'How many more days until we let them know it's just a joke?'

"Oh, it's a letter to Thingy on 'Who Wants To Be A Millionaire?' saying it's not back in a few moments. . . it's Minutes!"

Funky Facts: Sharks.

The Fish-Eye look

'We can't just ignore it. At the very least, let me touch it up in Photoshop.'

Nethead strip: Hypnotised by the net

'Thanks for coming in at such short notice Mr Finn. First the good news...your test results have come back...'

Phone Umbrella

My Way - 2020

"Are you two trying to play the imitation game?"

"For some reason, it looked way better on instagram."

Tightly run track meets.

"Selfies, selfies for my profile wall, but which is the fairest of them all?"

"I was going too ask Santa for the latest tech gadgets, but after seeing him using a flip phone, I'm guessing he knows nothing about technology."

Are you saying I have no control over when I upgrade my devices? In effect. You've got some kind of subconscious internal clock that drives you to regularly buy a new phone, or TV, or video game console. And there's nothing I can do about it? So it would seem. How freeing. Does this revelation come with a new credit line? Go away.