Territory Titan Gifts

"You're darned RIGHT it's a serious problem! Sales people, like goldfish, grow to fit their tanks! He's got to be transferred to a bigger territory, PRONTO!"

"Can we do that again tomorrow night?"

'Now that's what I call a kebab... a skewer with whole pies!'

"I've outgrown my backpack."

The household cavalry

"Bogeyman under your bed? Oh, no, sweetie, there's no room under there… unlike your closet."

"Perhaps we should cleanse our palates first?"

"Billy's room gets cleaned for free! The cleaning service uses it to train employees how to clean a hazardous waste dump."

Gary Basks in the glow of a fifteen-minute window with no empty cardboard boxes in the house.

'None of the other things had instructions.'

"If obsessing about trash is wrong, then. . . I don't wanna be right."

Football.

'A 'pregnant pause' is effective only if you've already said something.'

Cleaning Lockers.

A football player accidentally kicks off the head of another football player.

"I see you have experience marking territory."

'Now, you'd better pick up your toys or no bath!'

"I only live for 24 hours, so I need a temp job that pays big bugs."

Congratulations for male runner

'Sorry about the blindfolds girls, but I haven't had time to tidy up.'

Michael Schumacher

"And this was before you plumped the cushions, or after?"

-Yipee! He's well out in front! -You do realize they're only going down to the start!

Rafael Nadal

Plato seeking platonic love on Tinder

Kevin was very houseproud and it showed.

'Spinout!'

Coffee Cartoon - Takeaway cup size.

In case of urge to tidy up, clean glass.

'I couldn't get the beans out of the toaster.'

Rudy, I summon thee. You are chosen to carry it forth. The Tablet. Behold: the upgraded iPad Pro. Better than a computer with the thinnest design ever. And I am the chosen one to tell the masses? Sort of. We expect millions to purchase and carry the message, making this a must-own item for 2019. But, yes, I mean, totally, you're chosen. A worthy daydream tends to have some elements of reality. Quickly, give us your credit card.

This magazine has terrific ideas on de-cluttering. Let's hear. Start with just on pile. But which? How about this one? Good choice. It's magazines with terrific articles on de-cluttering. Next: magazines with bad articles!

'They've been hitting the blocking sled three times as hard since I put up that bust of that nut-job business teacher, Mrs. Sisk.'

Please pick up after your kid

Race car driver sees Pit crew member holding sign: Stop And Ask For Directions.