Telecommunications Fan Gifts

I'm having trouble with this new phone --- it has more capabilities than I do.

"Fill out an application? Can't I just text it?"

"Dear Wendy, please excuse the tardiness of my response to your recent tweet from Hoboken."

Time Machine Collision

"Dammit all, haven't they heard of e-mail?"

"Barbara, will you check your texts for a ring emoji?"

'Hey...here's a hot prospect...likes catching frisbees, chasing squirrels, rolling in smelly stuff...'

"It appears you have a virus."

'Did you get through to the speaking clock, Dear?' 'Tick and tock and tick and tock and tick...'

Workplace Confidentiality.

'My laptop's being repaired and I felt lost without a screensaver to stare at.'

"You're actually passing notes in class? That is so retro!"

A heat wave threatens an old woman.

"Just how powerful of a fan did you put in your computer?"

"I asked my investment advisor for something that was low cost, easy to manage, and also functions on its own. He suggested an index fund or a robo vac."

Veteran mistakes ironclad ship for Noah's Ark

"Tell you what, just tweet me your order when you're ready."

Smile you're on camera! You're also on my podcast!

"I suppose you're using all the modern technology, dynamic packaging, skype, web marketing..." "Yes, we even use carrier-pigeon.com."

Microsoft Merger

"I now offer DVR service for clients for want to see their future later."

'Uh-oh. They're bringing in the closer to secure the win.'

"Just a minute - I'm uploading."

Escalator joust.

"Everyone here is bonding over pictures of their dogs."

'You've got E.I.E.I.O mail'

'Maybe we should get into high-tech.'

Vents, real and digital.

Couriers and their customers often share a warm relationship.

3...2...1...I'm Recording

Heat Wave Podium

"It's for you."

'Giles has got his first follower on Twitter so we thought we'd have a few people round for drinks, just a small celebration...'

"But I'm hot on the trail of my Google doppelgänger."

'At the tone please leave your name and number.'