Teenager Daughter Gifts

'This program is geared towards the youth market. You give it up to five commands and it closes down in a huff!'

'His dad was!'

"No, you can't go to the rock concert! It's vital you don't damage your hearing!"

Young Frank Lloyd Wright

"Chocolate? I can't be allergic to chocolate! I'm a kid, can't you say I'm allergic to spinach or broccoli?"

Lady taking her little dog to the chemist with a cough

Robot Parts $5

"This isn't exactly what I had in mind when I told you to go outside and play."

"Are you insane?!" The Velveteen Skunk

'I'm reading aloud, Jeremy - My lips are SUPPOSED to be moving!'

Butterfly Woman

"You think you can? Think again, mister. You know you can. Got that?"

'Let the creepy crawly hunt begin!'

'You may now turn over your paper and begin.' - 'Sir!' - 'Yes?' - 'What is it?' - 'I think Train 'A' and Train 'B' might be going to crash!'

'I have this fear of the real world...'

I should be a writer when I grow up...

Skipping Horse

Blue Stockings - Woman revealing herself as author

Remote control pirate bully

Lady using paint roller as rolling pin for baking dough.

"Have you been on the moon again, young man?"

"Go ahead and eat her, she's a pain in the a**."

"I'm grounded. I forgot to delete the car's computer history after we did those crop circles on Earth."

"Do you want to pretend to be a doctor and I'll pretend to be a hotshot civil litigation attorney who sues you till your ears bleed?"

"Can we do that again tomorrow night?"

'Medical school's been more challenging since the cadavers turned into zombies.'

'Peter the Flying Hippo is my favorite storybook character without any merchandising tie-ins.'

Grad School Parent-Teacher Conference

Two children are running lemonade stands outside their home; one stand is more popular than the other.

"I've always dreamed of being on an academic team like this! It's great that we can all depend on each other!"

'When I grow up, I want to be a hydraulic engineer...'

'What would your mum say if she saw you drawing all over the wall like that?'

"Don't worry, dear. You'll grow."

Big Bang Theory.

'So far, I've taught him to fetch.'