Teen Troubles Aficionado Gifts

Zit: Pus based life-form whose main habitat is the teenage face. Normally peaceable, but he can react violently if threatened.

I will not talk in art class. I will not talk in art class. I will not talk in art class. I will not in art class. I will not talk in art class.

'I know how much you like holding hands, so I brought you a box of them..'

"Good lord, Billingsworth. You've stumbled onto the legendary Lepidopterist Graveyard."

'I couldn't put it down... I had peanut butter on my hands.'

"He loves me!"

'This is coming out of your allowance!'

'My Social Worker said SOCIETY is to blame for my loutish behaviour, which came as an enormous relief to me.'

Grim Reaper Hitchhiking

"I wonder why we're not getting any new converts."

"Wanting traffic to slow down, we don't post pothole warning signs."

"This zit is growing way out of control!"

'One for the money... two for the show... three to get ready, and four to...'

'It's probably a hormonal thing.'

"So, is there a Mrs Reaper?"

Life Support and Death

"I'm up to my neck in trouble, aren't I?"

'You're lucky your car's only being repossessed. Mine's possessed and I have to call an exorcist.'

'We've found life as we know it on other planets. All creatures have cars that break down when they're late for a meeting.'

'If you think you're going to sit around here while I wait on you hand and big foot, think again young man.'

"I'm trying to decide between a cocktail with a cute name and one that's blatantly sexual."

'First it's surveillance cameras in schools and now my mom wants to be my friend on Facebook, so she can check up on me.''

'I know a trap when I see one.'

'I figure, if the government can shut down, why can't I?'

"Knock 'em dead."

"They always just taste better here."

"A glitch in production - everyone gets a prune omelette with sardines."

'I wonder why we geeks don't get more women?'

The Grim Reaper updating a town's population sign.

"Is this a love hug or a want-money hug?"

'Quit referring to me as a Low Rider.'

"Today we will have the Swedish buffet!"

'Daylight Savings Time claims another victim.'

The statue of puberty.

Death on a gameshow: 'Oh, my...now contestant #3 has mysteriously dropped dead, so I guess that makes you, spectre of death, today's grand prize winner!'