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'Why would a just God allow so many teenage vampire movies?'

"Couldn't you have just laughed instead of spelling 'LOL' in your alphabet soup?"

"Would you sit and watch a 12 hour movie?"

"I'm just a girl, standing in front of a buoy..."

"Boy, this blooper reel from 'Manchester by the Sea' is a crack-up."

"That was totally....what's the word I'm looking for?"

"At some point, there's only so high you can raise the volume before you admit you're never gonna understand what British detectives are saying."

"'Tis but a scratch — in America, I'd still have to go in for work today."

'Teens are like trees, you can chart their growth by the number of rings.'

The Scarecrow Gets A Brain From Igor

"Hey, Bob. Things haven't been quite the same since Richard Attenborough arrived here, have they?"

A mummy, in police tape, chases a police officer.

'Say, are you in the mood for a Spielberg?'

"I see you've flown around the world in a plane, and settled revolutions in Spain. Around a golf course you're under par. Metro-Goldwyn has asked you to star. Very impressive, I must admit, but we're looking for someone with marketing experience."

The mission: Impossible burger.

"Santa's not been happy with your behavior in class and says, get it together or your Christmas won't be merry!"

Sylvester Stallone

"And this is my oldest son I was telling you about. The one that eats like a horse."

'No sequel? No movie version? Just read me the big money makers like 'Harry Potter'.'

'It's a horror-comedy.'

Dr. Strangelove, D.D.S.

I want to be a lawn!

"We can watch anything you want, as long as I don't have to keep my eyes open."

'Great! So that's the film... Now for the sound!'

'That was a great movie! Want to watch another video, dear?'

'Which way to the 'Waterworld' exhibit?'

Is there a reason I'm going into the red? Reason? Am I being penalized? Have I done something wrong? Maybe it's like A Wonderful Life. Your greed is catching up to you. You're experiencing bad karma. So I need to raise my prices?

Vanity Publishing.

Daisy Jazz Isobel Ridley

"Aaaaa....Chooo!"

'I'm sorry Donny...I can't get you any work. The studio says you're just too much of a stereotype.'

Millennial Splaining

'Stupid teacher! - I have to do a report on a book that hasn't even been made into a MOVIE!'

What I'd really like to do, of course, is direct.

'06 Graduation (The March of the Penguins).