Teen Life Sympathizer Pillows

'Good news Mom. I got into the college of your choice.'

'Hey Einstein, how about converting some of your mass into energy and getting this place cleaned up?'

"Three more years of high school."

'So Kyle - have you considered the challenges of van driving?'

PROBLEM AREAS

Fishbowl rebellion.

"My parents said that until I find a job and move out they will not recognize me as a sentient being."

"Wings will be cool, I guess, but I'm mostly hoping the braces and pimples fall off."

"Shouldn't you use a plate?"

"I'll be glad when this is over and Sarah can be herself again."

Welcome to your new English Class.

Teenage Angst.

'I'm going to bed...whatever...'

"And this is my oldest son I was telling you about. The one that eats like a horse."

Mentoring Unit: 'Go on! You can do it! You can be a mentor!'

"Okay, there's one thing I like about school starting. I have a girlfriend this year."

"Stop smirking, it's just an expression! You know perfectly well what I mean when I say I'm putting my foot down and you can't go out tonight!"

"I'm you, from the future, here to deliver a witty comeback line."

"That was a great kiss, Joey...but can I have my gum back please?"

Pubertry

"They're at that age where it's only cool to wag ironically."

Fishbowl Rebellion

Hi! You want to, like, hang out? Sure. When are you free? Twig! Time to pack. We're leaving!! In about a year? It's on my iCal.

"We're out of empanadas!"

"I told you it was too soon to give him The Talk."

Hey, Twig! Ryan Beardsley wants your cell phone number! The divine wonder of West Fester High? Finally! My life changes for the better. He needs activities for his college apps and wants to come to our shortest eco-club cleanup. Change you can believe in. West Fester High School.

"Hello, Sally? I've decided not to go to the concert. . . my father said I'd have to use my own money!"

'Oh, great... Big date tonight and I've got a zit on my nose.'

'He said he can't put his love for me into words because it exceeds the 140 characters allowed in a tweet.'

'You'r either having trouble hearing, or there's a boy you want to be closer to.'

Jesus As A Teenager Clears The Temple. . .

'I think he's beginning to notice girls.He's washed his face without being asked to!'

Guess what Daddy, Gerald plays hockey!

"You said you'd be home at half a candle."

'Be back by 5 AM, and NO texting while echolocating!'