Technology Resistance Gifts

'Miss Wayson, find out who put this computer on my desk and tell them to get it the hell out of here!'

"Well, guys... I guess we'll just have to ask Siri where we are." "No! Don't do that!" "Yeah! We know exactly what we're doing!" "Dude! Have you forgotten our credo?" "Society for the refusal to ask for directions."

I.T. Fear

Abandoning the computer for a typewriter.

The anti-social network: 'Hey Jeffrey...I need help setting up my dad's anti-social network.'

Honour Being Served 'Apps at Dawn'.

'I hate PowerPoint.'

'I can't work with computers, on account of my animal magnetism.'

"I'm worried about little Gwendoline. She's ignoring her phone and thinking on her own!"

Then one day I mistakenly hit "reply all."

"I don't get this. I know that you're a computer hacker and must have done many bad things. But your record is completely clean!"

A man looks out a newly made window, while a smashed TV lies on the ground

"I am worthy of human kindness and care. I am worthy of human love and respect. I am worthy of huma rights and equality....or death to the f**king lot of 'em."

'Your father is having a tough time with his online course.'

Enraged by Wikileaks reports of CIA domestic surveillance via home electronics, Della Dinkerbonker fights back.

"Judging by all the hair you've pulled out of your head, I must be hard to teach technology to than I thought."

'I remember my pin but I've forgotten my signature!'

"Damn change and newfangled ideas...if mindless back breaking work was good enough for my ancestors it's good enough for ME!"

Replaced by a millennial with artificial intelligence.

"I'm still trying to get used to ordering food online."

"Sorry, I double-booked. This wouldn't happen if I had a computer - but they insist we do everything by hand."

"Ms. Higgins, which button do I push for one of those cutesy, thing things, that people put on their emails?"

If Trump Launches a Coup D'état to Try to Stay in Power

'You go ahead. We'll rejoin you when you start using new technology.'

I hate blind carbon copies when the computers are down.

'Professional downloader of Napster files' looking for work

Hell for cashiers.

Skull Icons

"It's retro night, I turn off the wifi and everyone has to talk to each other. Party like it's 1995, dudes!"

The anti-social network: 'In other words, you want to help the internet blow itself up.'

"Harold still prefers falling asleep to traditional print media."

Call of the Wild Only

Couple holding sign reading 'Facebook is over if you want it'.

"I get instant messages, but they might as well be snail mail by the time I can get to the computer on my walker!"

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