Tech-resistant Hero Gifts

"I'm worried about little Gwendoline. She's ignoring her phone and thinking on her own!"

Spammatic blaster - gun to shoot pop-up ads.

"Yes, I'm a superhero. I'm not attractive, muscular or charming because I work in the 'cyber crimes' division."

"Now right-click on the icon."

"I want to get in touch with my inner child. I need the tech support."

'This model sends back a pre-recorded message to any hacker.'

'They call it a remote because that's the chnaces of me being able to program it.'

'Miss Wayson, find out who put this computer on my desk and tell them to get it the hell out of here!'

"Looks like another case of someone over forty trying to understand Snapchat."

Stressed Office Junior

"Sorry, I double-booked. This wouldn't happen if I had a computer - but they insist we do everything by hand."

"I'll be walking by your door in a second if you want to try to get my attention."

"Ms. Higgins, which button do I push for one of those cutesy, thing things, that people put on their emails?"

'I steal from the rich databases and give to the poor databases.'

'Don't get smart with me!'

'Fighting evil, fighting evil, fighting evil...oh, wait, how about the 17th, say noonish?'

'And then Steve Jobs invented apple computers.'

"Please help. Never learned PowerPoint."

Computer use issues

"So what do we do when we can't say anything nice about someone?"

"Just sitting here waiting for Facebook to go away."

'Computer crashed again, Martin?'

'Bob's served the company as man and boy, and as cantankerous old moaner who doesn't understand IT.'

"I can't get this stupid computer to work!"

A trapeze artist texting forgets to grab his fellow artist.

"My dad? Forget about it! He's clueless about cells...he'd never read my text messages...trust me!"

"What the ∆∂∑† do most of these Ω∞§Ωing buttons do?"

'When it comes to texting, I'm all thumbs.'

"I'm sending you back to elementary school so you can get your computer skills up."

"I can't call nobody on this newfangled dang cellular telephone!" "That's the TV remote, Roy."

"For your birthday I'm going to give you 24 hours technical support."

Peasant's emancipation.

'Not speaking to each other in a whole new medium!'