Technology Complainer Gifts

Trapeze Artist

'Not the bloody batteries again.'

"Scan my own items, bag my own food? If I wanted to work here, I'd fill out an application!"

Valuable business advice from some famous disruptive technologies.

'Tech stocks dropped on the finding that technology isn't neccessarily the best solution to everything.'

"You'll do everything...accounting, marketing, manufacturing...with no pay or benefits...and three years from now we'll trade you in for a newer, sexier model."

"AI chat bot"

Man from refuse department says: 'We'll send you a new wheelie bin, Mrs Trubshaw, there's really no need to 'orchestrate a mass Twitter campaign'.'

Oh, the armor is state of the art

Social media and censorship...

Modern Life Blues

Feel alienated by technology? Tell me more. Press 1 for yes, 2 for no.

#notblessed

'What's PPI and how did you get this number?'

'With all these mega mergers between electronics and telecommunications firms, I just got an obscene email from the toaster...'

"Frank, I need your help. The computers are down, but I was told you know how to multiply two numbers together."

"For a list of the ways artificial intelligence is killing your job, please press one."

"Do you remember when families used to get together and fight at Christmas?"

Welcome to Yosemite, Hell on Earth!

"How does one experience the ultimate selfie? Swallow your cell phone."

"My battery died too. Wanna talk?"

The nurse of the future

'Sir, our new automated telephone system saves us $20,000 annually, but our phone business has dropped 66%!'

Welcome to the real world. What just happened? Where am I? The Mall. The Mall. We've been shopping – in person. Not the kind of shopping where you order things on your phone and have them sent to your house. this is the jungle! And you didn't last five minutes! You were laid out by some geezer hustling to the grocery section to get a special deal on prune juice! E-commerce has made you soft! I've got a scratch on my iPhone.

"Would you put down that Kindle?"

"Judging by all the hair you've pulled out of your head, I must be hard to teach technology to than I thought."

"Counsel will be advised to not text message the witness."

'Somehow your medical records got faxed to a complete stranger. He has no idea what's wrong with you either.'

People are so engrossed in their phones that they don't notice the arrival of aliens.

Missing Disks.

Emojis for psychos.

Robojudge US patent pending

Mobile phones vs books

"In my day we had trimphones."

"Were the 'Trolls' internet trolls?"