Techno Geek Gifts

Battery Powered Businessman with Pacemaker/cellphone/laptop/watch/pager/calculator.

'The wheel was great, but what have you done for me lately?'

The Future: "Sorry, but I have to show you an ad now."

In the Guru District

"The good old days of eating the washing off the line are all gone methinks: The farmer has bought an electric dryer..."

The Computer Bore

Dear, could you please pick up some batteries? The ones in the remote are dead and I feel like I'm Amish.

'3 Second Loading Zone.'

'My name's Google and I'm being inundated with requests for information about every damn thing imaginable, by people I don't even know...It's endless!'

'Our parents were replaced by machines - We'll be replaced with new software.'

"No Timmy, I don't think your pencil has system requirments or upgrades you can download from the internet."

'Do you remember when our time away from the office was our time...'

"There's smart phones and smart cars, so why can't there be smart rooms that clean themselves?"

"Boss, the AI is actually smarter than all of us! It read our business forecast, jumped up and ran out laughing!"

'Let me through, I'm at Doctor.com.'

Claus 2.0

The DaVinci Code

It's a male thing - I saw a toaster with power assist, and I bought it.

"As you can see, I've alphabetized the items, presents owing if you will, so if you can digitally initial here, here, here, here and here and sign there. Thank you. See you December 24."

Girl with smart phone enters door that says "Social Media Studies"

"He might not have got the job with Google, but they weren't going to stop Brian skateboarding to the office."

'Why can't we have a texting bee?'

"I need a deeper access to his brain. Only google has the records."

"Remember when it was 'The Dog and Duck'?"

"One more time, Mr Claus - who sold you the data?"

'Can our software do that?'

'Who changed the password to 'arf'?'

'...and in 1/100000 of a second, it can compound the programmer's error 87,500 times.'

"No, I really thought each sentence ended with an emoji!"

Elfie Stick

"In the old days, we had to constantly feed the screensaver."

"Uh-oh...it's starting to delegate work to me."

If nobody had invented graphics

"My online account predicts the things I should own, then buys them with my credit card. It�s very convenient, but I do now need to move to a larger house."

The Little Search Engine Who Could: 'I think I can...I think I can...'