Technical Joke Teller Gifts

The Stand-up Petrophysicist...

"Chocolate? I can't be allergic to chocolate! I'm a kid, can't you say I'm allergic to spinach or broccoli?"

"Think of it as twenty one in human years. I'll take a bourbon and toilet water."

"You can access me by saying simply 'Agnes.' It is not necessary to add 'dot com.' "

'The history of Glue. It's impossible to put down.'

'Men are like fragments of soap... they get together in bars!'

'R2-D2 is not in. Please leave a message after the beep-wheep-zip-booop ...'

'What's that? It's a leaving present for the next person who comes in late.'

Shampoo.

Middle-Age Superheroes

"They communicate through clicks and taps."

How about going easy on the carbs

The only time cats are known to laugh.

'Hang on a minute: You're not going to transform into a Prince and leave me heartbroken, are you?!'

Driverless cars rage.

Screen Time vs Book Time

It's estimated that millions of trees are planted by forgetful squirrels.

'The boss said I never made any profits and I never found customers worth mentioning and that's why he promoted me to the company's chief bad example!'

'What sort of wines do you like?' ... 'Powerful ones!'

"I've put on a few ounces, but it's mostly paperweight."

Fenton G. Gonklemeyer, Computer Scientist - Booted Up 1928 and Crashed 2009.

'What do you mean, I just flunked the Turing test?'

"Excuse me ma'am, may I help you cross the road so that I can get the answer to this dumb joke my friend keeps telling?"

'But this is fantastic, professor! It's like no language I've ever seen before!'

"Good heavens William, what have you downloaded off the internet this time?"

"Of course we'll give you a choice. Would you prefer to lose your job to outsourcing or to robotic automation?"

GO AHEAD ... MAKE MY DAY!

"I haven't the slightest idea who he is. He came bundled with the software."

Pull my finger! Zombie Humor.

Chef copy robot

"When they said progress made our replacement inevitable I thought they meant by AI."

'Our family has a dry sense of humor, and we don't laugh that much.'

Baxter Higgleton, word balloon artist.

'Masonry robot, what are you doing?'

Backlash industries: makers of the macro-chip, bigger, slower..and it even makes mistakes