Techie Gardeners Pillows

"My plants have been growing so much better since I started texting them."

"He can't decide which one he likes best. . .His leaf blower, his weed wacker, or his metal detector."

What are you giving Mother Earth this year?

Gardener Cutting Tree into 'Rock' Symbol.

"You've just got to have the biggest and the best, have'nt you?!"

Bird Torture.

A Mix Up Between the Buggy and Lawn Mower.

A man repeatedly pulls the start cord on his lawn mower until it falls apart.

Okay, dig that one up!

"Before invasive species, the only things I could grow were weeds and mildew."

Show and Tell: 'These came from our orgasmic garden.'

'I imagine you'd like to hear about my progress...'

Shakespeare's Earliest Influences. To bean or not to bean ….. Ye Olde Limas. Jolly Goode Cukes. The Bees Peas.

"You didn't seriously think that one does one's own huffing and puffing these days, did you?"

"You've definitely got water retention..."

"Here's the new smart plant...it tells you when you're overwatering it."

Farmer planting the next crop of PC's.

'Mr McGregor's growing genetically modified carrots!'

"I love to hear the pitter-patter-patter...patter of his tiny feet."

Snail trap

'It's my first attempt at gardening but so far I've learned...'

Garden genomes.

Why is he always fooling around with plants? He wants to be a robotanist!

"I'd be fast, too, if I had legs that long."

"I can't believe I went so long without A.C."

'Sewer farm - 100% organic'

Dog sees venus fly trap catch a fly and copies it...

"Hey look! It perfectly matches the virtual pot plant I gave you last year!"

A Country Boy Throws a Turnip at the Squire.

Mowing the Jungle

"It was my husbands dying wish to be buried in his herb garden."

"Ahh, if I'm not much mistaken. The sound of a Lawn Chief 420. Fitted with a 3.5 horse power, Briggs and Stratton engine. Electronic ignition, variable valve timing and a 55 litre grass box. Mmm don't you just love our Sunday mornings dear?"

Man watching a flower slowly wilt, and just as its about to die he waters it

'I believe you want some fencing done at the bottom of your garden?'

'Mate, you've just paid two grand for a T-shirt and a hand-mower.'