Tech-support Survivors Gifts

"Yes I DO mind being put on hold! I only have a two week life span."

Computer Room.

'I have a plan 'B' but that's also dependent on a working projector bulb.'

"I find it so stimulating to learn new software."

My phone is synced with my tablet, my tablet is synced with my laptop ... but none of them are synced with me."

"A home recently sold in my neighborhood."

Well, you and I know it's our home, but our 'smart home' doesn't know it's our home

'Sorry, I can't help you, the computer's down again.'

Man leaving his office with his computer tangled around his leg,

'This Power Point slide has a dynamic layout comparing reading scores throughout the district, which you would have seen if I remembered to bring a spare projection bulb.

Tech Support/Counseling for Anxiety caused by tech-support.

"If the jumper cables don't work, I'll pour more motor oil on the keys."

'Technology hasn't saved me any money. I'm now supporting those relatives of mine they replaced.'

'Sorry guys! But i'm afraid we're going to have to shoot this segment again. The darn tape just ran out!'

The Importance of Data Backup.

'Your last tech job offered generous options? So do we: Take it or leave it.'

"I'm certainly no expert on the matter, but throwing the copier out the window just may be a sign you're suffering from stress."

"Did I just butt-dial my booty call?"

"My grandpa suffers from Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder from the time when he worked with Windows 95."

"I think I see your problem."

Computer frustration

"Damn it—I think I just butt-donated to a charity."

STRIP Hambone: Living in the box the computer who replaced him came in

"Due to heavy call volume, your wait time will be six years."

'...and we've converted this room into a home office.'

Computer Confusion

"I spilt coffee on my machine again..."

'For an English translation of what the tech support person says, press 2...'

"This is a support group for phone victims. Frank butt dialed. Bib drunk dialed, Anne there talked bad about someone, but didn't realize she hadn't hung up..."

I'm on live chat support, phone support, email support and text support - and they all have me on hold.

'My spreadsheet says we must lighten by 152 pounds.'

'Lord, NO! Take me instead!'