Tech-savvy Health Enthusiasts Pillows

'This less-weight app is great! It suggested I lie my mobile down on the scale instead of stepping on it myself and look - less-weight!'

"Daddy, you have to flatten this curve."

"We need to update your entire operating system."

"I have to get down to 125 pounds before I go back to my real gym."

"I think the 'Exotic Recipe' diet will make me lose weight. I'm running all over town trying to find the ingredients!"

'It's a nicotine patch...I've been smoking too much.'

"He looks so much like his dad."

'GM apples prevent Migraine'

"Thanks to modern medicine, we now have drugs to make any season the season to be jolly."

'If only you could do this with a cow once in a week, we'd save a lot of money for the food delivery service, Rupert!'

'I'm not sure how to break this to you all... the Atkins diet is back.'

'How could I have missed these? I took a multivitamin.'

'Like it? It's my digital vest, it calculates calories, portions and price per pound!'

'I don't want you to give up eating entirely -- just the food part.'

"Croissants? Donuts? Chocolate? Good price, madame! Good price!"

"Just think of this prescription as an app for your body...with side effects."

'I guess I don't need to ask how your new hip is working out.'

'Yes, yes, yes, now seriously, what can we do to improve our health?'

"No, I'm not able to transplant your computer's antivirus software into your body. Try washing your hands more often."

"And more intriguingly, your prognosis differs depending on which search engine I use."

Hold on - it may take a few minutes for his new pacemaker to sync with his Fitbit.

"GP or chemist? To be on the safe side let's go to A and E."

Eskimo to one with huge whale: 'You're sure it's all good cholesterol?'

Stay away from Pigs.

That's my diagnosis. If you want a second opinion, I will ask my Smart Phone

"The patient handed me this 'wearable technology' and said 'all the answers are on there'."

"So if I need to stop smoking and lose weight..what are you going to do about it?"

'Medical researcher have isolated the gene that makes us want to discuss our ailments with anyone we meet.'

"You should have purchased the extended warranty."

"You exercise with your phone?"

'This new diet drug comes as a pill, patch, or as a phone app with Siri saying, don't eat so much.'

"It's a very hip disease, so it's good that we caught it early, before everyone's talking about it."

"I've been using the latest home tech and apps to monitor my health....And after feeding the results into some online medical sites I discovered I was dead!"

"I think that form '10,000' steps may have been 9,999 too many!"

"Sorry about the long wait, but good news. Other than long waits in waiting rooms, I can't find any other causes for your irritability."