Tech-savvy Coffee Fans Gifts

"You order the raspberry danish?"

"Eewww! It still makes a lousy cup of coffee!"

Accept cookies?

Clive would be lost without his morning heart starter.

Customers must wash hands after using their laptops.

"I now offer DVR service for clients for want to see their future later."

Escalator joust.

'He knows if you've been good or bad - based on how many friends and followers you have.'

'We're out of coffee, sir -- would you like me to slap your face a little?'

'Santa sees you when you're sleeping, he knows when you're awake, he knows if you've been good, and he can find everyone's house with his GPS.'

'Bo-Peep was fed-up with losing us all the time, so she has us all wear these radio-locator collars now.'

"New Classic Books Revamped for Today's Youth"

'It's my re-moat.'

"...of course, you can always e-mail your list to my Ho-Ho-Hotmail account..."

"Coffee's been making me jittery, so I'm trying some herbal tea."

"...And use it wisely."

"So Joshua, you just aim this at any wall and it will come tumbling down..."

'What size would you like ma'am...e-mail, blog, or world wide web?'

'Look! Santa Claus is downloading presents.'

'Ms. Stevens, I've had four cups of coffee and I'm still sluggish. Would you have security bring in the Tazer.'

"I thought we were going to a different apple store."

"He used to squawk. Now all he does is tweet!"

'Please swipe your gun and then enter your pin number. . .'