Tech Satire Gifts

"The truth, the whole truth...so help me, Mr Gates"

"Talk nerdy to me."

The cell phone soother for life.

Airport Security.

"Now you can send it."

Kid arrives with CCTV camera, saying: 'It followed me home, can we keep it?'

"Blood pressure 210/140. Heart rate 185. Steps taken 29. Sedentary 9.5 hours. Calories burned 19. You da man! Oh, and you're out of pork rinds." "Our classics TV marathon featuring 'Gunsmoke' will continue after..." "The unfitbit"

'I don't like reading on screen, so I'm printing the internet to look at it later.'

"...in other news: Google has been admitted to the United Stations..."

'for more obit info, go to...'

"Oh no, we've been inned."

There's a lot of crying out there! Looks like we were gnawing on the internet cable...

Elon Musk in fly me to the moon

"He's been using the new virtual reality data viewer and climbing bar graphs..."

"I'm looking for a data plan that will be constantly out of service so I can tell my dates I didn't mean to ghost them."

"Sale. Save 100% of your energy by closing this website. Close now. No, thanks."

'Is that computer, down there, the one you were having problems with?'

'Why Isaac Newton kept returning to alchemy...' 'There's just no money in gravity.'

Peep-A-Boo Spyware: 'Your Privacy is Our Eminent Domain!'

I hate getting ready for Y1K.

It's your replacement for 'Nimrod'!

'Say, how can I convert this FAT file into a nice and small JPG?'

Lies on the Internet

"Bloody GPS-plotter is going silly again!"

"I hope you work out better than my last roommate. He had backaches, dizziness, and an erection that lasted four hours."

"Sorry Brian, bit of a rush this morning - I've left my face in the car."

'No thanks. This patch stops me craving for superflous functions.'

"It's part of our company's new health plan. You don't ever have to leave your desk for the virtual colonoscopy..."

"Hey, it's the scouting virus! It doesn't affect your pc, it just makes you want to go camping!"

STRIP Hambone: Woman referred to as software