Tech Junkie Gifts

"Hi. My name is Barry, and I check my E-mail two to three hundred times a day."

"C'mon, time to get up and stare at your devices all day."

'It's a new syndrome we're seeing more of... 'Google-itis'.'

"Memory? It has too much memory. Still holds a grudge."

"Could you please focus on the objective of this meeting, Tom... you can get back to your 300 followers later."

"Wifi's back up."

The Paleo-Information Age/The Information Age/The "Whoa, Too Much Information!" Age.

"They'e bred to stare all day."

In need of a wash...

'I love to see you all so busy!'

Dying for Social Media

'No, my girlfriend won't be joining me. She left me because she claims I care about my boat and flat TV more than her.'

"And this dashboard has all the electronic distractions grouped into one convenient confusion cluster."

"Scan it for signs of life."

Everything is charged!"

"Let me just check my email, my texts, my missed calls, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, WhatsApp, my credit score, my horoscope, the results of this latest personality test, the S. & P., the Dow, the news, this article about cute dogs, and the weather, and then we can go."

"It's just the government, dear..."

Last Chance To Charge Phone 50 Miles

New hyper-realistic Star Trek

"It's the new self-driving model."

Don't do that if you're expecting email! A watched pot never boils.

'Looks like Bob has taken his new e-commerce position a bit too seriously!'

Apple Kids

'It's the best investment I ever made - a 'random alibi generator.''

'Without my laptop, my cell phone, my beeper and my Blackberry, I wouldn't have time for a life.'

'He's had too much exposure to wi-fi.'

"It's worldwide phenomena. People turn into worthless zombies when their phone batteries die."

Four Stages of Communication: Tell, Bell, Cell, Hell.

I'd rather be phishing.

A case against talking furniture

Screen Time

Obsession with the mobile

"We're too late - the zombie apocalypse has beaten us to this planet."

"These kids and their shellfies..."

"I'm looking for a car that drives itself."