Digital Junkie Gifts

"Like, Like, Like, Like, Like, Like, Like, Like, Like, Like, Like, Like, Like, Like, Like..."

Oh, this isn't their hell. It's yours.

Aren't they supposed to be moving?

'I hope you can reform his addiction to computers!'

E-mail addiction

Wife putting a laxative in her husbands drink to get him away from his computer

"Any chance I could update my Facebook page?"

"Would you like me to annotate that for you?"

"Let me just check my email, my texts, my missed calls, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, WhatsApp, my credit score, my horoscope, the results of this latest personality test, the S. & P., the Dow, the news, this article about cute dogs, and the weather, and then we can go."

"Could you please focus on the objective of this meeting, Tom... you can get back to your 300 followers later."

Graduates on their phones

Addicted to Facebook...lost internet connection.

"That newspaper has been showing up ever since you started reading the news online. I think it feels betrayed."

"Siri, find oxygen."

"C'mon, time to get up and stare at your devices all day."

"I've downloaded an app to hire and fire people."

"Out of all your 277 passwords, not once did you use my name. Are you losing feelings for me?"

"I've just been reincarnated, anyone here know what iphone we're up to?"

'I love to see you all so busy!'

"These kids and their shellfies..."

"It's the new self-driving model."

New hyper-realistic Star Trek

"My self-driving car is wintering in Florida."

"After finally discovering that we exist, you would think you would have something more important to ask than if we had Roku."

Ian Hislop

Internet Cafe

Primordial Schmooze

Man bombarded by sale adverts in the media

"I'll need all the information you can find on why I need so much information."

"I need a more interactive you."

'I'm a has-been celebrity - get me in there!'

I'd rather be phishing.

Four Stages of Communication: Tell, Bell, Cell, Hell.

At the celebrity jobcentre...

"People mistakenly think that we accountants are all boring number crunchers, but the latest figures show that 54% of the 23% of people who responded to a survey were 45% in favour of us being 12% more interesting than average!"