Online Junkie Gifts

"Life beyound the web" "Fascinating, does it have a web site?"

"Sorry, I don't really believe in being social offline."

Web fatigue: 'Been there. . .downloaded that.'

'The wheel was great, but what have you done for me lately?'

"Would you like me to annotate that for you?"

"Good" "Bad" "Work on it" "Keep working - maybe it's not as bad as you think it is" "Put it to a committee" "Give up" "Make it worse" "Make it better" "Still a bad idea" "Overthink it" "Throw yourself into a pit of wild badgers" "Throw it away" "Call it done" "Sigh."

'I'm designing a robot that'll do my drafting homework for me,'

Addicted to Facebook...lost internet connection.

"Has anyone else noticed that the efficiency experts seem a little robotic?"

Oh, wait - Their king posted a declaration of war on your Facebook wall this morning.

"Mail's here."

"Wait -- I have an app that creates a napkin to write the contract terms on."

"What's orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot!"

"I've downloaded an app to hire and fire people."

'The next big thing is ultra nano.'

'I hunt and I gather. I invented multitasking.'

"This is genius, Ted. We can't use it. Nobody will believe I thought of it."

"There is only one thing worse than being talked about, and that is not being talked about. Lol. Winky face."

Primordial Schmooze

'Sorry, you're overqualified for this job.'

"So, gentlemen.... By investing in this time vortex manipulator, we will be able to cross the bridges before we come to them."

Internet Cafe

"Honey, our pop-up blocker stopped working again."

"I was at a party with SO many famous people, I was the only one there I'd never heard of..!"

"Actually, I worked my way up from ideas and you can too!"

"I'll need all the information you can find on why I need so much information."

'Hey! I've just had a great idea! How about a light bulb...?'

'So that's his secret.'

Books and Phones

'Aghh! I've been visited by the Russian mafia.'

"Dean Williams, the grant committee approved my research grant to determine how many research grants are a waste of government money!"

Help! Trapped on a desert island cartoon...

Elon Musk upset that 'X'is still referred to as 'Twitteer'.

"I'm from the Noble Prize committee. You're on to something big, but it's been done."

Life is ghoul