Tech Harmonizer Pillows

'He's a media consultant. He came with the multimedia software package.'

'Nigel, what have I told you about bringing your work home with you?'

French horn.

'He keeps grounding out the energy flow.'

"As a member of the Sunday praise team you are not allowed to "change it up", whenever you feel led."

"That Feng Shui class I took is paying off!"

No Instruments Please

'Fortunately, the Almighty is compassionate, kind, understanding, and hopefully tone deaf.'

A Lightning Conductor.

'Not that sort of rock garden!'

"If she has the voice of an angel I sure hope the others drown her out."

Remote work

'Ain't no lonelier life than being a free-range chicken boy.'

'I've no objection to children, darling, as long as they're carefully colour co-ordinated.'

'We want to adopt a kid. Do you have a choice our feng shui consultant can look at?'

Another thing is that it's really cool in the summer!

"That song in your heart has a nice beat to it."

Musician

Trumpet and birds

"Decide who you are, Wanona, before you buy sheets."

'Ned taps his pencil, Jill hums and Bill whistles - form a band, guys, and take it on the road!'

"Synchronized sitting"

A beekeeper with their bees

"No, this is the choir, NOT your backup group."

"I can't hit a bad note to save my soul!"

"My wife provides the scatter cushions and potpourri."

Cellist

"You're in my realm now - keep your hands off the thermostat."

"No, harps aren't mandatory. You could've asked for any instrument you wanted."

I trimmed my natural plantings to look good for your house buyers. Thanks! Someone is coming over now. I'll hide out with you. For sale. This is a well-kept street. People love their neat, green lawns. Doesn't anyone keep an eco-friendly yard?

'It could be worse. In Hell you play the bagpipes.'

"Harps only? Down, please."

The real reason we have natural disasters...

'I tried to get rid of his old chair by moving it into the closet.'

'Our counselor thinks we can work it out, but my Feng Shui consultant says I should divorce him.'