Tea Tactician Gifts

Barrister uses legal speak to ask for two sugars in his tea.

"Our new associate asks how much of a fee is too much. Do you want to handle this or shall I laugh in his face?"

'You're not confident at the water hole are you?'

US and the EU

'It's the essence of springtime. You're really enjoying it.'

Board Game Hunter

The Jose Padilla Experience

'This fortune cookie says 'buy oriental tea futures'...'

"Gimme a 'D'! Gimme an 'N'! Gimme an 'A'!"

Golf lessons

'...'Fire the coach'...'Fire the coach'...'Fire the coach'...'

"Before the defense rests, my client would like to read you a little sonnet he composed about his love for the jury."

"I must protest, M'Lud. Prosecurity counsel is blantantly attempting to wheedle the truth from the accused."

"But mom, all you said was 'get all your stuff up off the floor!' "

War never felt the same after the Great Puppy Ambush.

'Your Honor, we've finally agreed on a verdict.'

"I really wanted to get you off but I didn't want to make a mockery of Justice."

"May I treat him as a hostile lawyer?"

The Use of Cavalry

". . . and that dumb Mrs. Parker could have figured I had the Ace, King and Jack, but no, she goes ahead bidding in hearts. . ."

Kosovo.

'With your permission sir... checkmate.'

"China Ministry of State Security Royal Infiltration Training Unit"

'You didn't 'win' anything, just declared not guilty.'

'There is something I have been meaning to mention since I was named to the Supreme Court... I've never actually read the Constitution.'

Colin had finished the 'One Minute Manager' and was now practising the 3467 minute tea break.

"It has come to my attention that there's a traitor in our midst."

The 18-hole course is to the left and a 9-hole course is to the right --- Which do you want to play? I'll decide after my first tee shot?

"The defendant wishes to change his plea, from 'not guilty' to 'no collusion'."

Good news, I reduced your sentence from 250 years to 150 years!

'This board meeting will come to order!'

'My client is requesting a little more wiggle room,your Honor.'

"My client got twenty years, yet he paid me in full. It just shows the system works."

'I told you it wouldn't work. You just can't predict what a jury is going to do.'

'No I don't do decaf, soy lattes with a shot of vanilla!'