Taxes Gifts

The Meaning of Life/Tax Avoidance Advice.

IRS: You are here - arrow points to taxes, in between birth and death.

'I see you have all of your checks and receipts. What are you trying to hide?'

"Trust me, son, if there was a monster under your bed I would have claimed it as a dependent by now."

'What I don't understand is how all three of us managed to get the figures wrong!'

'We've merged.'

'I have to admit ... the fist pumps are making me nervous.'

Penny Saved, Penny Earned.

'When I die, please cremate me and send my ashes to the tax office. . .Write on the envelope, 'Now, you have everything.''

To err is human and subject to penalty

IRS: Short Form.

Irish Step Accounting

'Mind if I go in first?'

Good Accountant/Bad Accountant.

'The only thing that is certain in life is death and taxes!'

C.S.I.R.S.

"It was Socrates, wasn't it, who said, 'The unexamined life is not worth living'?"

'I've found an Inheritance Tax loophole!' - Immortality.

'Congress presented its report on simplifying the tax code today - it's 4,385 pages long.'

'Don't worry! Since 28% of my salary goes to the government, I've decided to work 72% of the time!'

"You can't be serious about all these travel expenses in December!"

'The dog ate my tax receipts...'

'You know, you're even starting to scare me...'

Two doors. One says, 'IRS Entrance,' and the other says, 'Locked.'

"I don't suppose you remembered the tax-deduction forms that I asked you to bring last year, did you?"

HMRC Self-Assessment - Poor

'You can keep the payroll -- I just want the payroll deductions!'

"I have a home office. Can I deduct trips to the kitchen and bathroom?"

'I'm with the I.R.S. you had better report this as income.'

'So much for the luck of the Irish!'

'...and then you smile and say...all together now...'that's not deductible.'.'

"I can't imagine how things could get any worse."

"Now, this over here, this is why you're going to have to go to jail."

'Albert, it was just a nightmare! Believe me, there's no taxman-monster under the bed!'

Tax Man Deducts A Witch's Broom As A Travel Expense