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"I'll be out of circulation for awhile."

'There are billions and billions of dollars of unreported income. How come we don't have any of it?'

"In examining out books, Mr. Mathews promises to use generally accepted accounting principles, if you know what I mean."

Burger King's buying a Canadian donut chain and relocating its headquarters to Canada to skip out on U.S. taxes. Amateurs. I've booked you an igloo even further north. You'll be negotiating the purchase of Blubber Brothers, a popular fast food chain among the Inuit. Congress decided to just make EVERYTHING legal, I guess. Actual Inuit stay in houses, but igloos were cheaper on Hotwire.

"If tax loopholes become obsolete, so do we."

'Tax evasion options are rather limited under PAYE.'

'What I don't understand is how all three of us managed to get the figures wrong!'

Foreign Markets with Big Barriers

'Progress of a bookshelf'

G7 Tax Multinational Companies

Next time, a larger tip for the server and less free tax advice.

"The Capt'n maintains a balanced portfolio should include a number of off-shore accounts."

'There's more to life than winning. There's also losing - to offset taxable capital gains.'

'As the government sees it, the U.S. budget would be fine if more deficit earners like you, Mr. Wald, go on the ball!'

"Which tax bracket are you looking to avoid?"

"Thank you, and may the I.R.S. accept all your deductions."

"So, you want your owners to write you off and treat you more like their kid?"

"You may think the government is a big 'Giveaway' program, but you can't deduct your tax as a charitable contribution."

'How's daddy's little deductions doing?'

"My MP ensured that there are laws which allow me to evade taxes legally. We both end up winning!"

"It's no use, Super Rich! Your labyrinthine, yet entirely legal tax structures are too powerful for me!"

'So, they weren't interested in your Robin Hood tax then.'

You want an extension? Good heavens, man, we haven't even paid for Reagans boondoggles yet!

"Carpe De Revenue!"

Congressional Budget Committee: Benefactor...Victim

"Don't you think we should wait to see the effects of the new tax code?"

"Get someone to make the slot bigger."

'Okay... now everyone smile and say: 'that;s not deductible'.'

'Aluminum siding will be used to cut costs in restoration at the U.S. Capitol.'

Osborne's Tax Cuts

If this carries on we're going to lose all our tax losses.

"You know what I hate about getting older? I don't have the reflexes to dodge taxes like I used to."

'Wouldn't it be easier if the banks simply merged with the Inland Revenue?'

New Improved I.R.S.

"There's no business deductions like show business deductions."