Tax Joke Lover Gifts

"Maybe you should have hired an accountant to check your return twice."

Welcome to New York City - add 8.25 per cent

"Could you bring me Mr. Trotter's tax return? It's pinned to the noticeboard by the coffee machine."

VAT receipt for sherry and cake awaits Santa

'This is his secretary - whom shall I say was being abusive?'

'Don't worry! Since 28% of my salary goes to the government, I've decided to work 72% of the time.'

"Just a minute, sir! Uncle Sam wants his tax cut on your ill gotten loot."

"You have to declare what you rob from the rich, but you can deduct what you give to the poor."

'Hey -- No fair peeking!'

'One advantage of having so many dependents is that I don't have to worry about income taxes.'

Yes, they are all dependants."

"You really clean up on these mileage deductions, don't you."

'Dad, did you say 'someday all this will be theirs'?' 'No, me say, 'The IRS's'.'

"Rapunzel,Rapunzel.Throw down your accounts for the last fiscal year!"

"Well, I'm sorry. The 3 wishes I'm granting can't exceed the annual exclusion of $14,000."

'We don't care if it's a boy or a girl, as long as it's a tax deduction.'

"I just asked to see his tax returns. It was supposed to be funny."

'How about a windfall tax on baked beans?'

"You can't be serious about all these travel expenses in December!"

'I've figured out a way to lower your income tax...give you less income.'

'This is for the V.A.T.- the Vicar's Autumn Treat!'

IRS, 'You filed your tax return two days late -- Why do you hate America?'

'Tax inspector: In. Out. Suicide notes.'

'Even if we did skin you last year, you may not deduct your dermatologist bill this year.'

Ever sensitive about its image, the IRS tries a more service-oriented approach.

'He's testing my Hippocratic Oath. He wors for the IRS.'

"Actually we're one of the few businesses that enjoy VAT visits."

'Oh...the IRS called. Something about an audit. I told them we weren't interested.'

Earl was obviously distressed, as he recounted under hypnosis how aliens had abducted him, and had their tax inspectors thoroughly examine his books.

"Think of the raising of taxes as a motivational tool to go out and make more money."

'Historically, the population decline started when the Dodo Government introduced a tax on flying...'

'It only made sense for us to finally merge.'

"Are you V.A.T. registered..?"

"Here's a new bill to pay...intellectual property tax!"

"Stop saying, 'Capital,' Gaines."