Tavern Philosopher Pillows

'Do you believe in the hereafter?', 'I'm not sure -- where are we now?'

'One reason I like hanging out with you is you give me so many good ideas for my sermons.'

'Time? Time's relative.'

'Men are like fragments of soap... they get together in bars!'

"I'll bet your're a Taurus. Right?"

'The way I see it, sobriety is a preventable, condition.'

'Of course I'm out of touch with reality. That's what I came here for.'

'Your husband? He's just leaving...'

'I trust these equations settle the argument, Professor Lang. It's your round.'

'We only serve menacing drunks here Sir, not small insignificant ones.'

"A sentimental journey of a thousand miles begins with the first martini."

I've decided to shift down a few gears.'

Men gossiping

Traditional Ale - Traditional Drunk

"When I was a child, I drank like a child, but when I became a man I put away childish drinks."

"If it's a series of patterned clicks, I'm not here."

"You want to know why I drink?. . . I drink to forget!"

'No need for pump action, Al - it's the wife.'

"Every night the same gets legless, swearin 'n' fightin' then slumps into a stupor. . ."

ONE HORSE TOWN

'They're not beer stains. This is actually a 'Rorschach test' patterned shirt.'

'Man. Piltdown Man.'

'Hold on there Jethro! You know I don't tolerate that kind of horseplay in this joint.'

'A quick pint or a quiet drink?'

Brickie's Mate

'Of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world, she walks into mine... LAST!'

"You're going to regret this in the morning."

I asked my girlfriend if there was someone else...

'All this talk about a consumer society... I don't buy it.'

'Fred is a social conservative -- he believes in slow food and heavy beer.'

If bar stools were like playground swings...

Body by Jake

"At least their bull sessions are green. Everything they say is 100% biodegradable."

Philosopher's pub with 24 hour thinking.

"Most men lead lives of quiet desperation. Frankly, it beats Pandora."