Tavern Storyteller Pillows

'Old McAllister is a real crank -- he has a conspiracy theory about Tom Bodett.'

The Stumble Inn Bar & Grill

Jolly Sailor - Warning: May contain old salts.

Joe's Bar, Get the Full Beer Experience.

"Wouldn't it be cool to live in the middle ages, Randy? We could roam the countryside on horses and carry swords?"

'You've had enough!'

'Another triple, Joe -I'm trying to forget several women.'

"You look good for your age."

'What a twist of fate!'

'Time? Time's relative.'

"I've stopped looking for work, which, I believe, helps the economic numbers."

'One reason I like hanging out with you is you give me so many good ideas for my sermons.'

"You must be the new barmaid."

Hugh - From Barnaby Rudge

Shanahan's

Joe's Bar - ask your doctor if Joe's bar is right for you!

'This is a no-frills bar, pal -- You bring your OWN napkins!'

'Do you believe in the hereafter?', 'I'm not sure -- where are we now?'

'Ooh, look at Ned. He must be practicing for some sort of shadow puppet competition.'

Child In A Bar.

'Switch me to the cheap stuff when I start talking with my W. C. Fields voice.'

'I tried letting it all hang out, and somebody stepped on it.'

Man leaving the tavern and realising he is late for dinner

'I used to do a lot of business over the phone, but as soon as Caller ID came along...'

"O.K., Let's try this scenario..."

"I have a female landlubber in every port."

'Oh, one of those tough guys with a mustache, eh?'

'How many experience points do I have? — I'm not that kind of girl!'

Joe's Bar, not for Sissies. Sissies, try Bruce's bar around the corner.

'I finally found my inner child! He grew up and will soon be sitting on a bar stool!'

'Don't make me come down there.'