Taste Bud Warriors Gifts

"Our rule of thumb is: if it tastes good, don't eat it."

'We use to tiptoe through the tulips. . . now we just waddle through the weeds.'

'4 Jello desserts - and, for the love of God, please make them all the same color.' (at restaurant with three kids)

And then in Italy. . . "But I really don't like bubblegum gelato."

'You want to eat out tonight? -- What if we get addicted to good food?'

'Say, aren't those the same weeds that came up last year?'

'Could I just get one that's wine flavored?'

The sword in the all-natural impossible-to-stir peanut butter.

Taking control of his opponent, Darren quickly slapped some deodorant on him.

I can't believe I ate all that kale for nothing.

'Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday you like beans, now you don't like beans.'

'We're at an Italian restaurant this time, Kevin -- those are breadsticks, not giant-size chopsticks.'

'Mind if I join you? I told your wife that if she didn't like the way I cook, she could have a run at it herself.'

"...and what has my culinary genius conjured up to delight my taste buds tonight?"

Dijon Vu

"Ordering groceries online can be unpredictable."

'What do you think? Does my lemonade need more sugar?'

'Your trouble is that you don't appreciate good food.'

"It probably tastes better than it looks!"

"The specials I didn't order sound so much better when you describe them to other people."

'Inside of me a thin person is struggling to get out. I find that person can be sedated with a piece of chocolate cream cheese cake.'

"I want my work to be challenging, but not so challenging that it destroys my life, family and relationships."

"Is it safe to assume that the meat is laced with antibiotics and the salad is chockfull of pesticides?"

'I do try to walk more! The donut shop is a good 1/2 block further tan the health food store!'

"Telling me how nutritious it is doesn't make it taste any better."

'Remember, the real lemon goes into the floor cleaner and the artificial lemon goes into the lemonade.'

"Did you folks enjoy your 'death by chocolate'?"

"But I had to eat all the cookies. I'm in training for Halloween!"

'Thank you for this food, and protect us from the additives and preservatives therin.'

Egg battle.

A mouth-watering Passion fruit

Well, I'm not leaving.

Pizza Restaurant sign reads: Under Old Management with New Owners.

Amazing new parenting methods...No. 94, preventing obesity.

"It seems an ungrateful and disrespectful monster has taken over Baldo's brain."