Tanning Connoisseur Gifts

"Light dark or crispy?"

Mike (The Situation) is rumored to have written the original manuscript for his best-selling memoir entirely out of bronzer.

"The university said he was a climate change denier so remove the statue."

'Hold on just a few more minutes. I want mine medium well.'

Wood Stain and Sun Tan Lotion

'You just don't know when to stop, do you?'

'With all the tanning lotion, sun block and moisturizers, we're more coated with batter than the onion rings!'

'Trucker's tan?'

Vista Acres - A tanned community.

"You know damn well what noise!"

"It's a belly button thermometer. When it pops up, I'm done!"

'How was your day Ma?. . .'

'Something needs to be done about the surgery room lights.'

'You're new here, aren't you?'

Sunblock

'The sun lounge book of melanomas.'

'Medium well, please.'

'WOW! Did anyone see the recoil on this baby?'

Frank was engrossed in his book --- He lost track of time and got a sunburn! Now he's well-read and well-red!

'Do you want it set for light, medium or butterball?'

Gym/Tan/Donut

"Rare, medium or well done?"

'No wonder you're more tanned than I am - you are nearer the sun!'

Crayo-Blah

"High time!"

Sun Umbrella

'Did you just curdle?'

'Stan, you are assistant bank manager now, no more sunning yourself during lunch.'

Lovely tan-lines George, lovely!

"Hold on there buddy, that's not a KJV Bible." (two men talking, one with a Bible)

"Edgar! I told you not to fall asleep under the sun!"

Tanning Machine on the beach

Woman sunbathing on snowy balcony under sunlamp.

'Ethel? It's Kay! A couple of those cheap lights in the tanning bed burned out again.'

"You really need some sun."