Tan Junkie T-Shirts

"The Englishman goes to the beach once a year to shed his skin."

'Hold on just a few more minutes. I want mine medium well.'

'So tell me why you think you're suffering from seasonal ineffective disorder.'

Wood Stain and Sun Tan Lotion

'With all the tanning lotion, sun block and moisturizers, we're more coated with batter than the onion rings!'

I know you're bored but you better not be doing that rain dance again!

'Trucker's tan?'

Vista Acres - A tanned community.

'I love us when we're tan.'

Revenge had come.

'He's not showing off to me as much as he used to...'

Homing pigeons in therapy.

'You're new here, aren't you?'

'Something needs to be done about the surgery room lights.'

Sunblock

"Hee-hee! I just squirted George Hamilton with sun screen!"

Sun Worshipers

Spatula beach

'Looks like they were sun worshippers.'

Cast away in a life raft with Dr. Phil.

"It's taking more and more destruction just to feel anything."

"I didn't know you liked ranch so much."

'The sun lounge book of melanomas.'

"Rare, medium or well done?"

Tree's Tree Nursery. I'm off work. Let's catch some rays! You already have a great tan from your job! You don't need to go sunbathing. Oh, yes I do!

One isn't snubbing One's wedding, One is merely celebrating One's wedding by topping up One's tan.

Gym/Tan/Donut

'Do you want it set for light, medium or butterball?'

'It feels like two hours of my life is missing.'

'No wonder you're more tanned than I am - you are nearer the sun!'

"High time!"

'Did you just curdle?'

Sun Umbrella

Lovely tan-lines George, lovely!

'Stan, you are assistant bank manager now, no more sunning yourself during lunch.'