Talkative Duo Pillows

"They're both in telemarketing."

Dialogue

'There's a bench over there why not sit down and rest your weary mouth?'

"Tell me about yourself. Any weird genes or anything?"

Pie chart of pub conversations

Imaginary boyfriends are best.

White Wine Wisdom (2)

'According to my Dad, bosses are just like headmasters. The only difference is that they give you money every month.'

'I preferred it before you started taking Prozac.'

'I can't keep a secret, either!'

'Are you still mad at me for calling you a creep in my letter to 'Dear Abby'?'

'Sure, I can talk, but I still feel culturally illiterate.'

'Well this shouldn't last long.'

The world of Freudian slips...

"You know, after all these years of giving you advice on all. Things personal and professional, it occurred to me that you've never actually asked for my opinion."

'And he's so-o-o-o knowledgeable about wine. He must have spent an hour telling me about his trip to Chardonnary.'

'Referring to God as 'she' seems to offend all the right people.' (religious people discussing religion)

'Mutter mutter...I was talking to my broccoli.'

"Phil is my Vice President in Charge of Snappy Comebacks."

"What is it about us that makes only crazy people want to talk to us?"

'Did someone forget to circle before dinner.'

'My dad warned me about fellas like you!'

"Not to be a killjoy, but this happened on our property. Are liable?"

"I hope you didn't pay too much for that parrot. It hasn't said a word!"

"I've got what it takes to take what you've got."

'Say 'Nessage in a gottle.' one more time and I'm putting you back in your box.'

"We could always adopt, like, 50 little bunnies from Asia."

"I still say it's a napalm tree."

"Of course I want your opinion... that's why I told you what it was."

"O positive, why?"

'So I talk to myself! What is it to you?'