Talent Show Star Pillows

'He went in for the Worst Singer and won first prize in the Gurning competition at the same time!'

"Britain's Got Talent is now in its tenth astonishingly brilliant year!"

The Drummer

Stan Mack's Real Life Funnies: The David Letterman Show Goes to the Dogs, Cats, Birds, Guinea Pigs...

Trump commissions song

'... And I'd like to thank my agent and everyone who voted for me... '

"This could be fun! Don't you do magic tricks, Cruz?"

The Ox Factor

"I'm a TV producer. I can get you on one of those fake judge programs, and you'll both become famous."

Executives are evaluated in Dancing With The Stars style.

'That should be an easy act to follow.'

"This next song is for all the music teachers who said I'd never make it."

'Thank you! This next song I wrote to prove that we accountants DO know how to be 'cool'.'

Well, it's not my fault if nobody bothered to tune the microphone.'

"Oh heck, it’s going to be a long night, someone’s pressed the golden buzzer."

'You call that carol singing?'

'For one of these girls, dreams of royalty are over...'

Eh... yes Mister eh... Genghis. Can I just ask where did you get your boots?

'...and all going well, definitely no more than 15 minutes of fame!'

The ocean is no place for a star.

'Usual Saturday night crap.'

"She's good because she is our bookkeeper."

'Sorry, I already have a Dancer.'

'I'm gifted but I hide it well.'

'Your huffing and puffing completely blew us away.'

Jerusalem's Got Talent