Talent Show Hopeful Pillows

'I blame the 'X' Factor.'

'He went in for the Worst Singer and won first prize in the Gurning competition at the same time!'

"Britain's Got Talent is now in its tenth astonishingly brilliant year!"

The Drummer

Stan Mack's Real Life Funnies: The David Letterman Show Goes to the Dogs, Cats, Birds, Guinea Pigs...

'... And I'd like to thank my agent and everyone who voted for me... '

Trump commissions song

Executives are evaluated in Dancing With The Stars style.

'That should be an easy act to follow.'

'That was the worst performance I've ever seen.'

Banana striptease...

"I'm a TV producer. I can get you on one of those fake judge programs, and you'll both become famous."

The Ox Factor

"This could be fun! Don't you do magic tricks, Cruz?"

"This next song is for all the music teachers who said I'd never make it."

'Thank you! This next song I wrote to prove that we accountants DO know how to be 'cool'.'

Well, it's not my fault if nobody bothered to tune the microphone.'

'Usual Saturday night crap.'

'For one of these girls, dreams of royalty are over...'

"Oh heck, it’s going to be a long night, someone’s pressed the golden buzzer."

'You call that carol singing?'

'...and all going well, definitely no more than 15 minutes of fame!'

Eh... yes Mister eh... Genghis. Can I just ask where did you get your boots?

"She's good because she is our bookkeeper."

Waiting to be discovered, or taken to work, whichever comes first...

'Sorry, I already have a Dancer.'

The ocean is no place for a star.

'I'm gifted but I hide it well.'