Tabloid Devourer Gifts

Magazine Lover's Weekly magazine

"I'm more of a 'How Jen stays thin' person than a 'Why Jen won't let Brad alone' person."

"Not that I have the time, but I enjoy reading."

"This place is famous for its short fiction about food."

Kid to boy in library: 'Oh, we came at the busiest part of the day ... it's a reading frenzy.'

She required plenty of personal space.

"And what self respecting tabloid do you think is going to buy photos of Little Foot?"

JET (Part I)

Paper Boy

Weditorials

"We're actually looking for a mourning person."

"And remember, people, it's better to light a scandal than to curse the darkness!"

'I want to sue my veterinarian. He didn't keep doctorpatient confidentiality and blabbed about my sex change operation to the tabloids.'

The Original Gossip Columns

'She's the worst gossip I've ever come across.'

Gossip columns: 'And rumour has it that singer, Kelli B is said to be in shock after finding out longtime boyfriend, actor Todd Korfull, has been having an affair with, now get this, KELLI'S agent!! YEEOUCH!...' A column talking

"Do I have to answer that? I wanted to sell all this stuff to the tabloids!"

The book that will not be denied!

"We'd love to stay longer, but we have to go. Give this to the tabloid press. It explains everything!"

'Have you got any good 'whodunnits'...?'

Leisure Editor

'Inflated gloom!'

Holiday Reading and Back to Work Reading

'Come in, Jordan - your time is up.'

Sally Jessy Raphael

Man to other: 'You don't really know what it's like until you've walked a mile in another man's scandal.'

'Oh great, now, not only am I cursed, but my photo is on the front page of the tabloids...'

Newscorp hacks into itself.

'Normally I don't like a newspaper because of its pictures.'

"Quick - make something up, I've got a space to fill."

Books versus TV.

"He used to fetch my paper, but now that I read online he's my IT support."