Tableware Lover Gifts

Bully in the China Shop

"I can't party like I used to, I've got enough Tupperware"

'Oh I don't mind you turning over my cups to look at the mark. But next time, please finish your tea.'

Office Furniture - Would you like to thump the table sir, to hear what it sounds like?

"Chef, we've run out of terracotta roof tiles!"

Tupperware Wolf

'Ignore him, he's just angry because you're eating out of his bowl.'

'I can't party like I used to. I've got enough Tupperware.'

"He's just p****d off, because these days, I'm more popular than he is."

'All dogs have four legs. All tables have four legs. All dogs are tables."

Football Drinks

"Waiter, I need a soup knife please."

"What 'Do-not-knock' list?"

'Erik hosts excellent dinner parties.'

Wedding Place-Setting Guide

'It's always a little dicey using tectonic plates.'

'They're nice, but do you really expect me to drink my imported Merlot from domestic Merlot glasses?'

'I wish somebody would invent the TABLE!'

Long table, long baby table.

"I thought we'd decided on the gold leaf pattern."

"Congrats! It's a spork."

"What is it with saucepans and your son Ned, Mrs Kelly?"

Life style guru

"Once we're in, Frank will get the TV remote, Eddie will grab the phone charger, and Ace - you'll be on tupperware lids."

'You ate the centerpiece, clodpate.'

'I used to have a drinking problem, until I got my two-handled cup!'

'He knows how to treat a lady.'

'I Love this gingham plaid paper service! They're so pretty, I'd hate to put food on them!'

"I had a feeling you'd appreciate the PTFE and PFOA-free non-stick, ceramic coating."

Gladiators.

"We're raising the children as forks."

We need tableware as wedding gifts. As a bachelor eating from a box, bag or can, Phil never acquired plates.