Syndrome Sympathizer Gifts

'Geoffrey's Tourette's is acting up.'

"Wait, you never wash your cape?"

Unwelcome guests can be caught and thrown out...there is no need to kill them.

"Let me take that for you."

"I'm sorry I hurt your feelings. Here, try this."

'I warned Harry that he'd have a bad hair day if he got near that leaf blower.'

"Well, you're not itsy-bitsy to me."

'If you can hear me, Larry Gligstein, please send a text to 555-703-7193

The Downside Of Being Superman, The Man Of Steel

I told you not to text and spin, Simone.

"EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK! Oh, it's only you."

"I keep climbing this water spout. The rain washes me out. Then out comes the sun and dries up the rain. So what do I do? I climb right back up again. Talk about a rut."

"Apparently they come into houses to find a mate."

Cartoon showing a man wrapped in a web, stuck to a wall. His wife is saying: "What have I told you about antagonising the house spider?"

"It's father, doctor, he's creaking badly."

"Lighten up, pal, it's only a spider!"

'I'm happy to say that both parties agree on the issue. It's got bi-partisan non-support.'

"Do you have any reading material that doesn't mock the sedentary life?"

GP motto 'If in doubt call it a syndrome'

"I've got a punture in the back wheel." "Just raise the saddle up."

"Brian says in 1976 we just got on with it."

Right v. Wrong Side of the Bed

"Look, honey! All your lost eye glasses have mysteriously migrated to this drawer, and now they're plotting their next escape."

"She's famous in here for having 5 conditions, 3 syndromes, and a decease named after her."

'Stay calm... It's probably more frightened of you than you are of it.'

'For goodness sake, do it properly! Use your EYES! It's all about the EYES!!'

'There it is again...that mysterious feeling that we're clipped from a newspaper and hung on someone's refrigerator.'

"...and how long have you had this feeling that women hate you?"

'And then the jury decided that I was ready for a long term relationship with the penal code system.'

"Woooooo... big strong man afraid of a little spider?"

"What do you mean I hurt his feelings?! He's a robot! He doesn't have any feelings!"

"Wrap it up, sir. Schadenfreude visiting hours are almost over."

Then again, maybe I'll just let the humans handle this one.

"I'm here to save you...for later!"

"Well, they always say it's the thought that counts!"