Sword Swinger Pillows

'Are you still sure the pen is mightier than the sword?'

King Richard I

"...But guess what Kevin's mother is doing for a living?"

"But I use all of them!"

'Tah-DAH! -- Guess what I conquered!'

Lady of the bath...

Tool Box

Film Festival. Events. Screenings. Ernie attends these festivals in costume. He's gone over to the dork side!

"We're never going to resolve this if you won't get your own sword."

Wouldn't it be cool if we could live in the Middle Ages, Randy? We could roam the countryside on horses and carry swords. We could hang out in taverns and drink ale, maybe earn enough coin to hire a hero … Then we could go on a quest. Maybe slay some golems. I think it's a real sign of intellectual maturity that we haven't even mentioned maidens yet. Real Middle-Ages maidens would eat you for breakfast.

"You'll get your sandbox back as soon as Daddy has practiced a few bunker shots!"

The Hockey Puckey

"Does it hurt when I do this?"

'It never fails. The mud's always one inch higher than my boots.'

'So you have to ask yourself: do you feel lucky?...well do you, monk?'

Corporate pirate.

Pub Kendo.

"Ralph - you'd play better golf if you had your eyes checked."

The strong corna war

Swords for Making America Great Again

Scheduel.

"Wouldn't it be cool to live in the middle ages, Randy? We could roam the countryside on horses and carry swords?"

Fencing Lessons

Jazz musician playing double bass. A cool seagull wearing sunglasses stands atop the instrument.

Battle.

'I think someone wants you to search for buried bones.'

Fun at the Office: Touché Break.

"Heh, I've left a pin on his seat."

The Lady of the Lake stabs a duck.

'Dad could use one of these when he's playing golf.'

Hockey Goal

'Bu it is Cup Final day, Boss!'

Man sharpening giant pencil with his sword

'Ever try beating a ploughshare into a sword?'

'The pen is mightier than the sword, and considerably easier to write with!'