Swimming Style Scholar Gifts

This fly is doing the backstroke

"All I do is swim and eat plankton, but do I lose weight?"

"Oh boy, that was a huge belly-flop..."

The Giamatti era

Too big to fail

Shallow End (Slightly innocuous statements) - Deep End (a little more weighty)

A man runs on the water from a shark.

Baseball players and their qualifications.

'Dad, can you teach me to swim?' 'Well, I'm not much of a swimmer, but I can teach you to tread water. I do that every day at work.'

"The peasants have lost all respect for the moat."

Lapdogs

'Dad demonstrates for an hour and then we go home - what happens in your swimming lessons?'

'Yeh it's just that I haven't been able to swim on my front,since my boob job.'

Medical Student

Lawyer, lawyer! Get out of the water!

'Yessir! That's what I want to see around our company - innovation and the bravery to do things different!'

'The swimmers line up for this, the final heat, and surprise, surprise, It's the dog paddle.'

A couple of polar bears enjoy their new swimming pool - a refurbished igloo . . .

'Yes, this is the deep end.'

Yes, well, when you're grown up and king, your castle can have an indoor heated moat.

No petting in the pool!

Rip Taylor Tide

'When I said shock the pool, I meant with chlorine!'

Motor Channel Crossing.

Bill Shankland

'Bank A' about to jump into to pool of competition followed by banks B and C

Thank you for not drowning.

'Not that sort of pool party.'

"Do you want to watch politicians promise to make American great again, or watch Olympics and bask in the glory of Katie Ledecky and Michael Phelps?"

'Right Sir, here we go...'

'What do you mean stop him - he's become the main attraction.'

"You're collecting for the local swimming pool? - Here, this is for you...!"

'Frankly I think he's taking swimming with the dolphins too far.'

"Ignore that sign. It's okay."

"I am wearing the new bikini you saw...unfortunately, my father saw it too, and made me wear this over it!"