Swimming Humorist Gifts

"Hey buddy move over! This is the fast lane!"

Open mike night presents Sadie Cohen. Summer's almost over

Christmas in the Fish Bowl

"Eww - that whale's breath smells awful!" "You could use a breath mint yourself, lady!"

"My wife is the queen of misheard lyrics! Listen to her singing carefully next time: it's hilarious..."

"I knew we should have gotten the shorter tree."

Guide fish.

That dolphin drinks like a fish.

Gym. Instructor. Why do you want to learn kickboxing? I've always wanted to win a fight hands down!

'You're not supposed to jump over the net.'

Another hot flash?

Shark Chum

"Norman's really into wild paddling."

Fish Farm.

"Of course I'm self-absorbed. I'm a sponge!"

"I have to go on a diet! According to that fisherman I have gained fifty pounds overnight!!"

"Here he comes! Don't move."

How Lawyers Evolved.

Fish: 'WHOA,Gesundheit!' / A Fish has sneezed out all of his scales

Need to turn up heat(fish crowd heater in aquirium).

'You see these things, you don't bite them, you suck them out...'

Acme Coffee Co.

'It's internal. Probably one of his stomachs...'

'Eton Football (By Dumb-Crambo Junior.)'

Track & Field & Stream magazine

'I wonder why goldfish are gold.' - 'So they don't rust.'

'I'm a Pisces.'

A Classic Goldfish Game.

The Pole Vault Washing Line

'I know it's tough starting out. Your father and I started out in a plastic bag.'

"You see, if we learn to swim upside down, they won't see us coming..."

Joe shoots his best scores with his graphite shaft!

'Sperm Donor Whale.'

'Like it or not, I'm having a guys night out. I'll be at the sand bar!'

"Is 'Upstream' where we really want to be?"