Sweet Tooth Negotiator T-Shirts

Online supermarket - "No you can't have lollies! You can't have chocolate! You can't have ice-cream!"

"Our max is six M&Ms for poop on the potty but try to hold her to three."

'If only I'd spent as much time on my investment portfolio as I did on my lolly mix when I was a kid.'

See, eating healthy isn't so bad...."

'But, Mom. Think of all the leftovers he can thankfully eliminate.'

"Stock options won't do it. I'll also need a ball of yarn."

It's a deal. You give me five analysts, three pundits, seven technicians and a soothsayer. I give you six experts, five professors, four consultants and a prognosticator.

Diets: Sweets and Biscuits.

"Well, maybe you want crackers Mum, but frankly, given the choice, I would prefer chocolate cake..."

"Why did God make fruit if he also made candy?"

"You're good mum. But, Billy's mum is a better cook than you. She only knows how to make chocolate cake."

"Look, you bake the cookies, I eat them the system works."

"I'll trade you my cupcake for your head lice."

"Ask Mom for Sweet Chunk Cookies. If she says no, ask Grandma."

'If I promise to be good for the next 30 years, can I have some sweets Dad?'

"I just called to say I love you, but come to think of it - can I borrow some money?"

'We cut it into teensy-weensy squares.'

Revenge is a dish best served cold.

'Someone come and mediate our argument about mediation!'

"Cupcakes for the judge? You're new here, aren't you?"

Mum's Apple Pies With Acknowledgement to Dad

Dieting is for losers.

"What do you have that justifies its calories?"

"I learned that I'm more of a leaf pile jumper and less of a leaf pile raker."

'Skip the meal more room for dessert!'

"Sign the contract first kid, then you get the sweets!"

Soooo, you want to play hardball.

"One is a sham bag for my parents to confiscate."

…Here's the deal…You get your brother and sister to finish their fruit, vegetable and milk, and I'll get you extra dessert… Food Pyramid Scheme.

"So...were they open to negotiations?"

"Neither of us are dentists." "True, but we're saving a fortune on candy." "They probably give out healthy stuff." "Let's go next door."

Maybe substituting chocolate cookies for poker chips wasn't such a good idea.

"Five kids have signed my petition. We'd like to have vegetarian options on the cafeteria menu. To help, I've put together a few recipes of my own."

"The sales figures are now in and I would like Tom to chew over them this weekend."

'I'm afraid I can't do business with you, Miss Carstairs -- you're just too damned cute.'