Sweepstake Enthusiast Gifts

"Now we move over to the sports desk."

Pirate eye test

'Geez, I hate these fun runs!'

Post Game Day Betting.

'The trouble with living on a farm is there are too many things a child can do.'

'Sunglasses? Silly hats? Face cards?'

"...and how do you feel about being labelled the new Great British hope?"

'Too bad you couldn't find my tax returns! This time see if you can find your tax rates!'

Vote GOP: 'Lowering taxes for the rich creates jobs, in the huge demand for security guards!'

'Eddy - For Heavens sake, stop watching Pirates-of-the-Caribbean-movies!'

"Holly and Michael were growing envious of their son's imaginary friend… Rickey and me are going to the Knicks game with Bruce Springsteen!"

Using a social media app to date

'That time of year, eh Ben, don't know whether to go hunting or fishing?'

"This is supposed to be the clean room so we'll give it an additional five minutes."

Second to Nun

Bicycle Pie Chart

"...Then when Rockefeller and Goldwater have the convention tied up in a knot―we spring Charlie on 'em!"

'I've really been cleaning up in the Las Vegas poker rooms.'

Man reading letter, 'You may already be a winner' about to step on rake.

'The entire team is lethargic. Tell the athletic trainer to whip up a cure.'

"Right swipe, right swipe, right swipe..."

"I'll trade you my pink pills for these blue ones....what do you say?"

Akin Remarks explode in the Republican's face.

'You can argue until you're blue in the face, Todd. But you rolled your eyes, and Adolescent Ref is not going to change his mind!'

"It's not a riot, Dear. It's a football game."

Ted Budd Caricature

Republican Dog Walker

"If winning isn't everything, why do you break down and cry when your stocks fall?"

'Yeehah! On to New Hampshire!'

'I think I just got a hit.'

'You're excited about winning a traveling toothbrush kit in a sweepstakes after spending $300 on postage and entering 1,500 contests?'