Swear Enthusiast Gifts

'She discovered Gordon Ramsay.'

"Excuse me, I'm here to do some sole searching."

"Will you be taking these home or chewing them right here?"

Romance

The Stat-shoe of Liberty.

Shoe addict.

New Shoes.

Mystery Solved - Boxers or Briefs, 'Thanks but you could have just told me.'

Mister Pretty Shoes

"It's the only way I can justify buying so many shoes."

"Do you do much walking?"

"That shirt is so last year."

"I feel there's a whole culture around mules."

"Have you seen that sweater that you crocheted for me?"

"Sold For sale Ellie Kopp 1-800-238-7463 Yaffle Realty Stop renting. Buy your boot from a boot."

"Buying me a new pair of shoes would go a long way toward making this world a less dangerous place."

Christmas sweater alternatives

'They're both nice - which can you ill afford least?'

"Dear, you are Definitely coming back as a centipede."

Fake fur coat and no knickers

'Why, yes, I think that's a lovely sweater, Peter... But you know the rule: no snacks unless you brought enough for the whole class.'

"Do you have a shoe for roaming and prowling?"

'They're bound to hurt at first.'

"No one will ever take you seriously with those tassels."

"I'm never ready for sweater weather."

The Hooligan.

The wetsuit preferred by 9 out of 10 executive windsurfers.

"I'm sick and tired of black."

'Stop crying! Daddy wears BROWN shoes!'

'Of course we can fix your sweater but we'll have to contact the sheep to match the wool!'

'I'd like a few words with you Farnsworth. Aren't those my shoes you're wearing?'

Ugly Holiday Sweaters

The tortoise and the hare are in a shoe store trying on shoes in preparation for their race.

Casting out the Shoe Devil.

'Please don't read anything into the fact that I'm wearing loafers. I assure you I'm a very energetic worker.'