Swear Enthusiast T-Shirts

'She discovered Gordon Ramsay.'

"Excuse me, I'm here to do some sole searching."

"Will you be taking these home or chewing them right here?"

Romance

The Stat-shoe of Liberty.

New Shoes.

Shoe addict.

Mystery Solved - Boxers or Briefs, 'Thanks but you could have just told me.'

Mister Pretty Shoes

"Do you do much walking?"

"That shirt is so last year."

"I feel there's a whole culture around mules."

"Have you seen that sweater that you crocheted for me?"

"Sold For sale Ellie Kopp 1-800-238-7463 Yaffle Realty Stop renting. Buy your boot from a boot."

Christmas sweater alternatives

"Buying me a new pair of shoes would go a long way toward making this world a less dangerous place."

'They're both nice - which can you ill afford least?'

"Dear, you are Definitely coming back as a centipede."

Fake fur coat and no knickers

'They're bound to hurt at first.'

'Why, yes, I think that's a lovely sweater, Peter... But you know the rule: no snacks unless you brought enough for the whole class.'

"Do you have a shoe for roaming and prowling?"

"I'm never ready for sweater weather."

"No one will ever take you seriously with those tassels."

The Hooligan.

'I'd like a few words with you Farnsworth. Aren't those my shoes you're wearing?'

"I'm sick and tired of black."

Casting out the Shoe Devil.

'Stop crying! Daddy wears BROWN shoes!'

'Of course we can fix your sweater but we'll have to contact the sheep to match the wool!'

The wetsuit preferred by 9 out of 10 executive windsurfers.

The tortoise and the hare are in a shoe store trying on shoes in preparation for their race.

Ugly Holiday Sweaters

'Sure it looks bad now, but try to imagine it with the right shoes.'