Sustainable Farming Fan Gifts

'Free range isn't all that! We basically get leftovers from the cattle!'

'One day son, all this will be Monsanto's'

The new green legislature requires methane mitigation.

"If you could just get rid of the split ends, that will be fine."

Raptures

Yoyo sheep

'You may not feel any healthier right away, but you'll definitely feel more smug.'

HELLth Food Sprouts

Apparently all our farts damage the ozone layer....

Bio-Engineered Fruit of the Month Club

'Remember to eat your 500,000 a day son!'

Despite Having Given Up His Veterinary Practice George liked To Keep His Hand In...

'This'll save a couple of journeys!'

"It's a scientific breakthrough! This seed will produce less corn...thus driving up the price!"

Old MacDonald had a genetically modified farm.

"I'm an ass is half-full kind of donkey."

'Dad, are you sure this is building the right muscles for football?'

She kept Dracula at bay with an episode of the Archers.

Niche Extracurriculars

"Well yes, I was shorn by the apprentice, but I don't mind really: everybody has to learn somehow..."

Little Farm Shop of Horrors with G.M produce turned into man eating plant

'Is it true you're covered in genuine pigskin?'

You can always tell animals trained by 4H kids.

'this is the only place where no one is fooling around with the genes.'

Free Range Eggs - ""I've decided to sell up. I'm having trouble making hens meet."

U.S. Farm Production: Cup Runneth Over.

"Aren't you getting a little carried away with this herbal medicine, Doctor?"

"One of your delicious ducks got into my yard yesterday."

'I got the job, Mom. You always said I'd make a living with my hands.'

"Sprechen ze MOO MOO?"

"OK, today, Bob, your team is on blackberry clearing at the Brown's farm, while Lisa, your team is on thistle clearing at the Barker's farm..."

'I told her not to follow me!'

"The future of resilience is diversity, not monoculture. And I'm not JUST referring to vegetation."