Suspender Stylist Gifts

"Well, the first thing we're going to do is loosen those suspenders!"

Bad hair day!

People in the mirror may be more attractive than they appear.

Pashminas are sooo noughties!

Beauty is in the eye of the manipulator.

"Oh to be young and in love and wear things cut on the bias."

"This is daring, but I like it."

"Don't shave it. It gives your face character."

Shoe addict.

'Half-baked beans, low fat variety' "Who says we have no taste?"

"I can never get my sunglasses on my head the way my hairdresser does"

'These fit just right. Do you have anything too tight?'

Pampered and poodled.

"I don't like your application."

My Bangs: A Play in 5 Acts

The Young Ladies' Young Gentleman

'Trust me, it's very proper to mix stripes.'

"A naked dress is perfect when you have nothing to wear."

"Amazing! It's the season of me!"

Curling your hair for no reason

Dolores is so avant garde.

"Who's a pretty girl now?"

Thank you for purchasing the first modular dressing kid for guys

"How come in these days of downsizing and lower expectations, all these sneakers come with ridiculously long laces?"

"Perhaps a cozy scarf to go with the hat?"

"It's a nice halo and all, but I'm not sure it matches my outfit."

"Next time you meet me dressed as a giant boy, it's going to cost you a pair of diamond earrings."

"I'm not trying to be beautiful, I'm only trying to look better than everyone else there."

'Which fashion magazine do you recommend?'

'I know I don't look like a matinee idol of yesteryear anymore, but neither do they!'

'I think there's been some mistake...'

"Would the gentleman care for a razor and comb to start?"

Half-Price Haircut and Half-Cut Price Hair.

All it takes is a little willpower and a good metabolism...

Cinderella insisted on always having glass slippers - even into old age...