Survivalist Joker Gifts

Man pulls out Palm Tree on Deserted Island.

"Together ideas for couples" "Slap a sandwich together" "Put two and two together" "Pull themselves together" "Rub two sticks together" "Try to hold it together" "String a phrase together"

Desert Island Meals.

"I dunno, looks like a trap."

Desert Island BBQ

Child laughs while making farting sound under arm. Dad says, 'Isn't it nice when they find something they're good at?

Problem Solving: Man rows desert island to land.

'I'd like two pizzas, one with cheese and pepperoni and the other with cheese and sausage. One more thing, do you deliver?'

Get crazy once in a while

"Walking erect is very trendy now."

"More rescue efforts, less screenplay."

'Arf! Arf!'

"Ok... for today I want a 500-word essay on what you know about nothing."

Angel wears t-shirt with logo: YOLO.

'He refuses to leave without the tree and their son.'

'No, I didn't know it was hunting season - why do you ask?'

"Yes, I'm alone."

'Want to freak her out? Stare over her shoulder without blinking for 10 minutes.'

"Day 736. Still loving the fact that I can smoke all over this island..."

Never pick a fight with a comedian.

"Yes, I'm sure of my 3 wishes - I wish I had a pen, I wish I had paper to write a 'rescue me' note, and I wish I had a bottle to send it in"

'I'm glad to see you've started building a boat.'

"That's 'Help' with an 'H'."

Bob liked a challenge, and the shipwreck gave him something to get his teeth into.

'Remember, son, don't believe any thing you hear and only half of what you see.'

'I've heard all about you. Jayne says you're quite the prankster.'

"Is it just me, right, is it just me ...?"

'Do you have to be so melodramatic?'

Doug reasoned that things could be worse...but just how much worse...he wasn't sure??

"What, no day spa? And you call this a luxury bunker."

"What do you mean, you 'feel funny'?"

A castaway on an island with an old TV that's washed ashore, sees two men in an approaching boat marked, 'TV Licensing'.

Unlike modern day hipsters, pre-historic hipsters didn't need to rely on yoga, hiking or even rock climbing to stay fit...

Here lies BoBo the Clown

Toilet humour