Surprise Avoiders Pillows

Where the Appalachian Trail Crosses the Path of Least Resistance

"I think I'm having pre-traumatic stress disorder."

Worried man looking at stock market chart on his computer screen with office party going on in the background.

"I hope you don't call that a party face."

'Before you give us your surprise test, could we have a surprise study period?'

'I'm tired of roaming the earth. Can we just stay home tonight?'

'Thanks for the invitation, but I can never seem to find the energy to party...'

"Let's see what's going on in the world."

Nervous at a party.

"Shouldn't you be studying?

"Cool bonfire app, man."

"I want the contract to say that if we win a championship of any sort, no one spills champagne on my head."

"In all of Montana, you’ll not find a more sublime flyfisher than Mittens."

'I'm going to prescribe for you to stay away from the news on TV and all social media!'

'I wish i could think of some way to get away form him.' 'I wish i could think of some way to get away form her.'

"I'll go on a cruise, but not if I'm forced to learn things."

'Honey, I would love to go out with you, but I feel like an idiot at all your friends' parties. The conversations are always way above my head.'

Snoozed when I should have schmoozed.

" will enver read that book, and I"m eagerly waiting to avoid the movie."

"I'm not getting out of bed. What's the point? Things keep getting worse every day. Even my toothbrush depresses me... I'll just continue sleeping until the world comes to its senses." "Amen."

"It's just a little device I use to help relieve the anxiety from meeting new people."

'On second thought, dear, could you toss me the car keys?'

'It must be a milkfish.'

"I want to vacation where we can look at something scenic from some place climate-controlled."

"Yes Dad! I can see the ground way way down below very clearly! It's not unrelated to my reluctance to try flying!"

'I bought him off the Internet. Don't be alarmed if there's a small charge on your credit card.'

'He says he's an old friend from your childhood.'

'Aunt Val's pretty cool. . . Kind of hot actually. . . for an older lady.'

The Occupy a Barstool Movement.

2016 Policlicks

Medical Exam

"I invited a few friends over. Don’t worry – you can still be miserable."