Party Avoiders Pillows

"I forgot to charge him."

"...Our extensive in house survey found that 82% of you think in house surveys are a waste of time."

"I think I'm having pre-traumatic stress disorder."

"There appears to be a direct correlation between fewer meetings and higher productivity."

Worried man looking at stock market chart on his computer screen with office party going on in the background.

"I hope you don't call that a party face."

'Thanks for the invitation, but I can never seem to find the energy to party...'

People who work-from-home, annual get together.

"You know I hate birthdays!"

Nervous at a party.

'Somehow it just doesn't seem worth it for a one man business.'

"I want the contract to say that if we win a championship of any sort, no one spills champagne on my head."

'I wish i could think of some way to get away form him.' 'I wish i could think of some way to get away form her.'

'Honey, I would love to go out with you, but I feel like an idiot at all your friends' parties. The conversations are always way above my head.'

"Die alone"

"It's just a little device I use to help relieve the anxiety from meeting new people."

Snoozed when I should have schmoozed.

'Actually, I hate places like this.'

Election Cancelling Headphones

"We've been standing here talking about how to pitch to the batter for way too long, haven't we?"

'I guess it's true what they say: spirits just don't mix'

"Not having to go into the office every day has really cut back on pointless meetings..."

'Wilcox! Do come in...I'm just leaving!'

'Is he expecting you?'

Desperate employees escape through bosses high-rise window. 'Hurry! His meeting is almost over!'

"I invited a few friends over. Don’t worry – you can still be miserable."

Herman likes to stay in his comfort zone.

Christmas Hat Tree

'No, I don't like dancing.'

"We came early to avoid the conga line."

"Thanks for bringing the party mix, but. . ."

"Did someone forget to invite Dwayne?"