Political Avoider Pillows

Election Cancelling Headphones

"The kids love it, and it's saved my marriage."

"I'd like to book 10 days going anywhere they've never heard of Brexit."

"I think I'm having pre-traumatic stress disorder."

"I find it best to stay out of office politics!"

Worried man looking at stock market chart on his computer screen with office party going on in the background.

"I hope you don't call that a party face."

'Thanks for the invitation, but I can never seem to find the energy to party...'

"Really? After all these years of you begging me to let you come and howl at the moon, now that you're a teenager, it's not cool to be seen with your dad!"

"Well, so far I'm managing to stay above the fray."

Bob liked getting involved - but not actively involved.

"Let's see what's going on in the world."

Nervous at a party.

'Honey, I would love to go out with you, but I feel like an idiot at all your friends' parties. The conversations are always way above my head.'

'I wish i could think of some way to get away form him.' 'I wish i could think of some way to get away form her.'

"You go on ahead. I'm going to hang out here for the next few months until everyone stops saying the word 'caucus.'"

'I'm going to prescribe for you to stay away from the news on TV and all social media!'

"It's just a little device I use to help relieve the anxiety from meeting new people."

"I'm not getting out of bed. What's the point? Things keep getting worse every day. Even my toothbrush depresses me... I'll just continue sleeping until the world comes to its senses." "Amen."

" will enver read that book, and I"m eagerly waiting to avoid the movie."

Snoozed when I should have schmoozed.

"Prayer does work! I wasn't picked for any of the church committees."

"I'm actually looking forward to age-related hearing loss."

"I invited a few friends over. Don’t worry – you can still be miserable."

2016 Policlicks

The Occupy a Barstool Movement.

Herman likes to stay in his comfort zone.

'How To Say No To Sales People'.

'He always breaks away from the Church on Sunday mornings.'

"We came early to avoid the conga line."

Good parenting.

"Passive-aggressive musical chairs." "You sit. I don’t deserve to" "I couldn’t possibly." "Maybe two of us could share." "Someone else go first." "I actually prefer standing."

"I envy you, not having any idea of what's going on these days."

'I roll over and play dead when I don't want to see someone.'

"At last — no Trump."