Surgery Superstar Gifts

'Now don't be deceived; I'm making this look very easy.'

"I just scrubbed."

'OK, the old one's in my right hand, the donor's in my left. Rght?'

'Oh, believe me -- you don't want to hear it in layman's terms!'

Nurse pushing the Grim Reaper out of the Surgery room.

'Gee!' (doctor looking at x-ray)

'G-g-golly! One day out of med school and I'm about to perform brain surgery! Just look at that scalpel shake!'

'Apparently it's part of the evolutionary process!'

'Is there a chance you will die under the anaesthetic? Well, that is the killer question.'

'Let's cut right through to the heart of the matter.'

'Yessir, I just finished my first spay...but how did you know?'

'Do we have any oldies but goodies that you would care to hear?'

"It was a botched surgery."

'You'll be awake during the entire procedure...but no peeking!'

'You know what'll do wonders for you? A nose job.'

'Anaesthetic ok?' - 'Yes, ten double scotches from the pub up the road.'

101 uses of a dead cat: pincushion

Surgery has sign on wall saying 'To Err is Human.'

"Okay, he looks pretty stable – switch the middle screen back to the Superbowl."

A football game appears on the operating theatres monitor instead of the patients heartbeat.

"The good news is that you inherit Mr. Brumble's entire estate, Miss Finster. The bad news is that he owes an outstanding balance to your plastic surgeon!"

Pinocchio has a nose job.

"So your agent doesn't like your lawyer, and your PlR. people don't like your manager. They all like you."

Healthy.

'I know we're all terrified of malpractice suits, Bob, but as plastic surgeons, I think we can do a little more than just 'style his hair and call it a day.''hair

Anatomy.

"It took a lot of hard work to get here, but it was all worth it in the end."

He said he loved her for her brain but was her appendix he was always taking out.

"And it'll stay clamped until you play my Usher CD."

Quilt fanatic

'Just remember, you're not alone - I'm scared to death, too.'

Anatomy.

"Look, I'm the bobblehead of this team."

"Is there a spin doctor in the house?"

'There's been unexpected complications involving your husband's bill.'